Oh My …

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September 17, 2004 at 10:42 pm

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I expected this week to be a little off-kilter due to having jury duty on Tuesday. As it turned out, jury duty was nothing compared to the “excitement” that preceded it.

I visited Mom and Dad on Monday and my brother showed up as well.

We were having a grand ol’ time, which any fan of horror flicks knows is a sure sign of impending disaster.

Scene 1: Dad sliced his finger in classic “slasher” style with a Dremel cutting tool. Delivering his line like a practiced stage actor, he helped us with the television remote before non-chalantly noting, “I think I’ve done a number on my finger.”

Scene 2: Mom grabs her car keys and Dad to get him to the nearest minor emergency clinic or ER — whichever’s open after 9 PM.

I clean up the subtle red trail Dad left from the kitchen to the living room during his “performance” (thank goodness for laminant flooring!)

Scene 3: Mom calls to let us know they’re at a local ER since the minor emergency clinic was closed.

Scene 4: Dad calls. He’s gotten stitches and is okay. However, Mom took an awful fall in the hospital; the full force of her fall went to her face and jaw. She’s on an I.V. and her blood pressure’s all wonky — the hospital’s not entirely sure they’ll even release her overnight.

{Special Effects Cut Scene: Footage of a bicycling enthusiast performing a classic }

Despite the word from Dad, the full severity of Mom’s fall was a little lost on my brother and I as we waited at our folks’ house. You have to understand, our mom’s resilient and stubborn to a fault — it’s one of her most vexing yet endearing qualities!

Despite decades of rheumatoid arthritis and some very hard falls (including a fractured pelvis, which healed in record time), she keeps on trucking. She’s more active and mobile than some people half her age.

Scene 5 (Final): Mom and Dad walked through their front door. My brother and I turn ashen white, which at the time matched Mom’s color perfectly. She looks like she’s just been trapped in the ring with Mike Tyson, except thankfully both her ears are intact.

She’s in obvious pain, and next to her, on her arm, is Dad with his stitched and gauze-wrapped finger.

What a sad sight they made!

STATUS UPDATE: It’s several days later and I can report that Mom and Dad are faring okay, though Mom definitely suffered the worst of the injuries.

She’s already been subjected to treatment from an oral surgeon, with follow-up visits in store when her swelling and pain ease off. I visited her briefly on Thursday and she was looking and sounding better — slightly better than I’d anticipated, in fact. Still, a fall like that would have laid me out flat for at least 10 days!

REMEMBER — LIFE IS HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH!

I love you, Mom & Dad! You know all your “kids” (Justin included) are not far away should you need anything!

Let’s make the next get-together a little more uneventful, though, OK?

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